“Do you see that I am your friend? Can you see that you will always be my friend?” These are the words of Wind in His Hair to Dances with Wolves in the 1990 movie of that name. These two characters would have had reason to stay enemies. Yet, they manage to overcome the misunderstandings and false narratives that unnecessarily divide them, and instead grow to have a deep friendship. The gift of mercy and reconciliation that they give to each other brings about healing and allows the truly beautiful gift of friendship to grow instead of hurt and blame.
In today’s first reading, we see David trying to offer this gift of mercy to King Saul. David and Saul had been friends. David had only been good to Saul. Sadly, Saul lost his love for David through sin and jealously. As we pick up the story in the first reading, David has fled and Saul is pursuing him to try to destroy him. Through God’s providence, a deep sleep is cast upon Saul and his men, and David is able to walk right up to him. He could easily have killed him. Saul was trying to kill him, so this would even be a just thing to do. But David refused.
David refuses to fight back against Saul. Instead of killing him with his own spear, he takes the spear and stands off at a distance. Much like Wind in His Hair, David yells to Saul that he has always been his friend. He has nothing to fear from him. Despite Saul’s unjust treatment of him, David does not try to get even, but instead offers mercy. Rather than kill him, David simply shows Saul the spear, proving that he could have killed him but chose not to. This powerful act of mercy is similar to the native American practice known as “counting coup” in which a warrior, instead of killing his enemy in battle, merely taps him with a special stick and receives an eagle feather as proof of his heroic deed. He was powerful enough to kill his enemy, but even more powerful in choosing not to.
We too have a choice to make when faced with great suffering that is unjustly inflicted on us. In today’s society, it is common and even easy to go chasing after “justice” when we’ve been hurt. If someone hurts us, we want to get even. There can be times when fighting back is called for. Indeed, if there were no life after death, then we’d have to fight to the death to “settle the score.” But the fact that we believe in a life yet to come gives us another option. We can forego strict justice and retribution in this life, in view of the better life to come. God’s merciful gift of eternal life allows us to offer the gift of mercy to those who hurt us.
The really good news is that this gift of mercy is not just a “delayed gratification” as we store up treasure in heaven. Choosing to be merciful makes our lives, and even the entire world, a better place right now! Jesus showed us the true power of mercy from the cross. He was the most unjustly attacked person ever, yet he willingly laid down his life for the very people attacking him. God has been so merciful with us! Who is God asking you to forgive today? Where are you being invited to offer mercy? Maybe there is even someone from whom you need to beg mercy for yourself. If there is some way that you can add mercy where there is only the ugly cycle of hurt and retribution, you might just be surprised at the beautiful relationship God can bring about.
2 comments
Thank you.
Once again you are so right!